A visit with Santa

For the first year ever Connor is truly enjoying the Christmas holidays. He sings carols, "We wish you a Merry Christmas", "Rudolph the red nosed reindeer". Of course those are the only lines he sings of the songs and sings them over and over and over. His enthusiasm over everything to do with the holiday has caused whole sentences to erupt from him such as, "Look at that snowman!". Every inanimate Santa Clause gets pointed out and several times he has attempted to get to the neighbors sleigh and drag it home.

I was still nervous about his reaction however when I found out that they were to have Santa at the Occupational therapist office. Plastic and pictures of Santa are not the same as a "real" Santa. We had already found out that our OT had double booked herself for our slot and we would be seeing the male OT, something we had never done before. Connor took well to Mr.R and soon was letting him chase him through the halls while he rode a bike.

I wait near the kitchen area of the gym for them to make their next round, but after awhile they hadn't come back. So I started to go up to the front and hunt them down. As our usual OT passes to clean up from being vomited on from her other client she informs me that Connor and Mr.R are going to see Santa.

Mr.R meets me on the way to the Santa room. "Connor's Mom! Come on, quick!"
So I rush to the Santa room with him not really knowing what to expect, to see my boy half skipping, half running around the room shouting "SANTA!" "SANTA!"
He had already had his picture taken with Santa and was now running and dancing around the room.
"SANTA!" "SANTA!"

Connor would stop running, come up to Santa, get near his face and say in the lowest voice possible "HO! HO! HO!"
To which Santa would respond, "HO! HO! HO!" while Connor examined how his mouth moved in the sandwich of mustache and beard.
Santa would interrupt Connor's running by throwing his arms in the air and yelling "Connor!"
In response Connor would put his arms up and yell "SANTA!" and they would give each other a bear hug.
He danced with Santa and wore the biggest smile ever.

It couldn't have went better than if I had dressed up as Santa myself.

Strides in achievements

January 9th, 2007 we got Connor's diagnosis. We cried off and on for a few days, read everything we could to get an idea of what we would be up against. We researched the best proven treatments. Most tell you the basics; speech therapy, occupational therapy, gf/cf diet, floortime, and ABA. In everything we read it said get ABA and get it now, 20 hrs a week or more if you can get it.

But we couldn't get it. Medical insurance would not pay and every charities' waiting list was full and seemed quite comfortable telling me I had to wait another year. All the time I keep hearing about this window. A small sliver of time in which I have to pull my child out to join the real world and not remain trapped in his own. After finding one program that would pay for the ABA, we were shot down because he was not in danger of becoming a ward of the state and was not in danger of becoming hospitalized due to self injury.

We had decided to try one more time after we were turned down. The next person to take our application was good. Very good. Now we have ABA and the new therapist has already started working with Connor. He loves her and tells her so.

We are only 1yr 9 months since we got his diagnosis and he has made more progress than I could have ever dreamed in such a short span of time.

The main things; He talks! He says Mommy ( and everyone elses names). He knows kisses are good for ouchies and sadness. He knows happy, sad, and scared. He knows how to argue "No, you broke it!". He is beginning to tell the difference between girls and boys. He is now using the potty, even though it is only to urinate and only if he is semi clad. He knows his alphabet and can put the letters in order if they get mixed up. He knows his shapes. He can count to 60. He knows his colors and loves to show off how smart he is.

This past Friday he let my daughter's friend know that she is brown. I thought it was great, he is so pure of heart and loves to show off for the ladies. There was no doubt that there was no racism in it, he has no idea about race. I am steadily waiting to lose an eye when he discovers mine are brown and tries to point out the fact. I am also waiting for him to tell me I am pink or peach with brown spots.

Another birthday...another chance for disaster

The end of August til the end of November, we have a large amount of birthdays and anniversaries in my family. Followed in quick succession by winter holidays.

The first of two end of the year birthdays at my sisters was coming up. This one for my dear brother in law. We prepare ourselves to head off triggers where possible and to give sensory when needed. We pack pressure garments in the car for Connor and Excedrin in my purse for the rest of us.

Our first obstacle was to be the entrance.

Usually it goes like this, ring doorbell or knock, person answers, Connor melts down on the entrance way, Connor recovers after a bit and enters premises. This time; door opens before we ring bell or knock, Connor enters happy as a lark.

Second obstacle, food.

Usually he is not interested in eating, but enjoys crumbling any bread substance to crumbs. This time he was thrilled to see "waterbolen!" (translation: watermelon) on the table and sat down and ate.

Third obstacle, singing 'Happy Birthday'.

Usually we all join in for a very out of tune version of the song and Connor either screams "NO!" or just runs from the room. This time he walked into the hallway and when we were done came back out to blow at the candles.

Usually after this we have had to pick up a completely out of sorts little man and carry him to the car and go home. This time he was enjoying himself. He was cooperative. He was talking to his aunt. He even made sure that he got his uncle's attention to tell him "Happy birthday! I love you!" Which is huge!

We all had a great time and stayed for a few hours, during which time Connor identified his uncle as "Damy". No one, and I mean NO ONE would have gotten away with this nickname. I don't think anyone would have even dared to call this very large man "Damy". Of course Connor gets away with it, we were all thrilled that he knows who he is and "Uncle Damy" couldn't be happier.


p.s. To my sister and her family, Thank you for a great afternoon. :)

Birthday cake anyone?

Connor got his first invite to a friends birthday party. Getting there was half the fun as Walmart was his preferred destination and when I pulled over to detangle the seat belt around his neck he thought we had arrived at the party. A few scratches later we did arrive at the party.

Guess what happens when you have three autistic toddlers, a couple NT children, and a bunch of adults at a child's birthday party. A good excuse to install a Xanax dispenser!

One toddler (mine) ran terrified looking for a dark place to hide when "Happy Birthday" was sung. One toddler withdrew and stimmed. One ate his cake, while looking for an escape route. One mom (the birthday boy's) had an anxiety attack. Then we moved the party out to the back yard.

Connor saw that there was a riding tractor exactly like his. He promptly grabbed it tipped it on it's back wheels and placed it where he could keep an eye on it. He scared one little girl away who tried to ride it, and ran faster than I had ever seen him when a boy said he wanted to ride it. He then hid it in some bushes. The birthday boy walked the perimeter of the yard and then went to stand behind a different bush. The other toddler ran from swing set to pool and back again rubbing his nipples.

It was really nice meeting up with the other parents and when we got home we were all nice and exhausted. Connor was fed, bathed and in bed when I happened to walk past his potty chair and saw PEE! I have never been so happy to see pee in my life and even though my youngest daughter suggested he may have poured some liquid in there, I was ecstatic.

He has been using his potty chair ever since Sunday night and I couldn't be happier for the progress he has made. But there are a few things to work out. First, if he has pants or underwear on he will not use the potty chair. He is to start school next week and I'm afraid of him regressing as I can't send him half naked. Secondly, he takes the potty chair to whatever room he knows he is going to be in, last night he grabbed it and ran to the living room so he wouldn't miss any of his video. Bowl movements still require a diaper and no one around, but I think the other problems should be remedied before we work on that one.

Any suggestions are appreciated, and a special thanks to Hubby, who modeled what to do for Connor even in that tiny chair!

Thankful Thursday...or is it Friday already?

After much thought and being quite sentimental this morning, I thought it time to thank a few people in my life that keep me from going over the ledge into insanity.

My daughters. Beautiful, intelligent, driven, and considerate young ladies, who see to it that I get a few minutes each day to breath! You are the walking, talking pieces of my heart.

My husband. Hot headed, quick tempered, and potty mouthed, and yet takes the time to listen to all my crazy theories and ideas. Gives me sound advice, supports whatever I decide to do, and takes it upon himself without being asked to help me with calls that have to be made. I love you more than I can stand to put down in words.

My sister. The absolute poster child for fierce love of family. She listens. She also gives me sound advice. She understands about Mom. She doesn't judge. You give me more strength than you can possibly know.

My Grandmother. Who understands and lets us have a few minutes on her front step so Connor can adjust and let himself in the house when ready. Reassuring me it's no problem 'she has read all about them'. It means alot that even though we don't see her often, she bothers to take the time to read up on his condition.

My Friend M. To be honest, at first I wasn't sure I liked you. My opinion was you were too damn chipper to be the Mother of a little boy so similar to mine. How wrong I was. You have helped me realize just how lucky the both of us are. You have inspired me with your relentless drive. You celebrate the little things with me because you truly understand how "big" they are. You let me rant and sometimes let me listen to your rants. I am lucky indeed that your truly annoyingly cheerful ass saw fit to invite me and Connor to your play group.

Yesterday Afternoon

There is a new boy in my oldest teen's life. As much as I would like not to have these worries of teenagers and their hormones, I must admit I like this boy. I also like that the parents are involved in his life much more than the last boy, making it much easier to for me to keep tabs on my daughter.

His mother had invited Melody over for dinner. She was to be there at 4:30. The poor child was a case of nerves and the effect was that we were ready to leave the house at 3. I had to pick up some things from the store anyway and knowing how it may or may not go well in the store for Connor I decided it was good to leave this early.

Once strapped in his car seat he begins a chat "Hat, hat, hat, hat..." all the while pointing. He directs my driving all the way to the store of his choosing at which point the chant gets more intense and higher pitched "HAT! HAT! HAT! HAT!" As we are turning into the parking lot his sisters try to get more information out of him about this hat.

"What kind of hat is it?"
"Is it."
"Is it a Lightning McQueen hat?"
"Lightning McQueen hat."
"What color is it?"
"Color is it."

I am convinced at this point he is too excited at the prospect of getting the hat, he is only going to echo whatever is said to him in hopes he says what he needs to in order to get it, but they continue.

"Is it a black hat?"
"Black hat."
"Is it a red hat?"
"Red hat."
"Is it an orange hat?"
"Orange ha........NO!" I could hear the annoyance in his voice and thought that if I could have seen him at that moment he would probably be rolling his eyes.
"Is it purple?"
"Nooooo!"

Once inside he leads us not to the hats but to the toy department in the car aisle. He goes to one spot and points up. I don't see anything but a collections of Cars the movie figures that he already has. He is pointing at one in particular so I ask him "You want this one?"
"Want this one. Yes." he replies.

I pull it down and he doesn't take it but continues to point to the one behind it. One he doesn't have, one with hats. He must get a better view of things at his height. His memory of where he sees them amazes me though.

GF/CF chicken nuggets and other misadventures

We have jumped on to the bandwagon of the gluten free/ casein free diet. This has been tough! It seems everything in the known world has gluten and or casein in it! If you add to this the fact that my little guys craves bread and breaded things like a crack addict, then you can see the recipe for disaster.

I've had help along the way with removing all offending foods from the house. Other Moms have directed me to Whole Foods Market with lists of gf/cf items, things that are soy, almond, loaded with proteins, and other good things. My daughters, Connor, and I made a trial run to this store, just to see if the atmosphere was acceptable. Check the lighting and glare of the frozen food section. There is no toy department so this is a major plus. Though my youngest daughter did say the seafood section smelt like a penguin exhibit.

We all loved this place! Connor had his little basket and we did manage to get cf soy cheese, a watermelon, spinach, and juice smoothies before we had to go. He never had a meltdown or run across anyplace in the store he couldn't stand to be, but he had his engine on high and wanted to see every bit of the place at lightning speed. The girls and I did our 'divide and conquer' move, and made sure he was in someones sight and safe at all times.

After our trip it was time for me to make the gf/cf versions of his favorite foods; cheese bread and chicken nuggets. The cheese bread was easiest. A premade personal sized pizza crust, soy cheese, cf butter with garlic microwaved for a minute and he ate the whole thing. The chicken nuggets have been a bit more challenging.

Every single recipe I have tried he has looked at the nuggets then looked at me and said "No! Chicken nuggets!". So I tried to fix the shape of the nugget to look more like what you would get from fast food places or the store. "NO! Chicken Nuggets! No! Chicken Nuggets!"

I bought the microwave dinners with chicken nuggets and french fries, taken out the nuggets that come in it, replaced them with the gluten free ones and popped the tray back in the box and back into the freezer. This seemed to work until he picked one up. "No! Chicken Nuggets! No! Chicken nuggets!" Have you ever picked up a chicken nugget from a fast food place? If you squeeze it a little it is kind of spongy. If you take a bite and look at the meat inside it you will see that it is preformed meat. After lots of research I found out that those little beauties my sons loves so much are not only preformed Frankenstein meat but it yields a surprisingly large amount of skin. Yeah, I don't know how I'll get over this stumbling block. I'll figure out something.

I would like to give a special thanks my sister and her co-worker Mrs. Kimbrough
for directing me to A Year of Crockpotting.
The family has enjoyed 2 solid weeks of gluten free/ casein free meals! While Connor has enjoyed his chicken nuggets.